What is Love?
As we approach the Hallmark Festival in honour of Saint Valentine's (and because I'm in the middle of 'February Focus'!), I'm left contemplating the age old question; what is love?
Is it grand gestures, bended knees, crazy big diamonds, bottle of Dom Perignon, romantic, epic love letters? What is love, real love?
My sister Chris bought me a beautiful little book edited by Ursula Doyle a few years ago for my birthday; 'Love Letters of Great Men' and while the marvellous men inside the covers profess undying love in the most eloquent of words, there is a cynic in me that thinks the gentlemen, in this case, doth protest too much. Lord Nelson for example wrote to Emma:
'I only desire, my dearest Emma, that you will always believe that Nelson's your own; Nelson's Alpha and Omega is Emma! I cannot alter - my affection and love is beyond even this world! Nothing will shake it but yourself; and that I will not allow myself to think for a moment is possible.'
There are a dozen or more letters in the book, all the same wordy declarations of undying love and they got me thinking perhaps all they were, were just that; words.
Love isn't just words, it isn't extravagant gifts, it's actions; it's the small things; making your tea exactly how you like it, leaving you the last biscuit because he knows you've had a hard day, it's watching mindless telly because it's your favourite show, sacrificing nights out so you can chase your dreams, it's believing in those dreams with you and pushing you to chase them, it's getting up to give the boys their breakfast so you can have a lie in, it's the smiles, the cuddles, the lingering kisses that still give you butterflies after all this time, it's holding your hair back when your sick, holding your hand when your scared and holding it all together when you can't, it's laughing at your jokes, when you know they're not funny, listening to you moan when you've had a lousy day, it's never judging you, always supporting you and always having your back.
Love is knowing someone completely and accepting them for warts and all. Love is the little things that when put together a mass to something far greater than the two people it is shared between.
So what is love to me? Love is life, an ordinary life shared between himself and myself, but that in itself is extraordinary; out of our love have come our two beautiful boys and the prospect of a lifetime of love, adventures and memory making.
Valentine's should be a reminder to appreciate that ordinary day to day love - not a reason to break the bank or out do the next person with the best gifts. Show someone you love them with real love this Valentines; make that cup of tea, leave the biscuit, put on the electric blanket, empty the bin ......tell them you love them.
Wishing you all a very love filled Valentine's.
With lots of love and chilled bubbles (probably not the Dom, but I live in hope ;),